I'm doing some re-writing, which is difficult because I want to keep the participants in this scene where they are. To do so, I have to make all the characters active participants, not merely spectators.
Motive and advancement are the keys: motive for why characters are where they are, and the advancement of the story, in particular, giving the reader an impression of the characters.
It would be easier to simply cut a few of them out, but the set up is too important to reduce the participants, thus it becomes more complex.
The worst of it is that this scene is from two perspectives, the good guy and the bad guy. Yep, the bad guy. In this book, there's no reason to hide the evil-doer - or in this case one evil-doer and one unknown factor.
I've written a great piece for the villain (a beta reader said so, nyah) but I fear it may have to go. I'm holding onto it, though, in case I get a spark of brilliance. (Which is doubtful at the moment because I'm choked up with drugs to get rid of this early Autumn cold. I'm thinking weird thoughts already.)
Anyway, I'm becoming increasingly desperate to post these three chapters by the end of the week. With two full days of writing, I should be able to do it - snotty or not. It's a deadline I'm not willing to let go.
But, I'm halfway, so that's good. Time to get back to it.
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