Grammuh

I've been working on a proofreading and editing exercise, number ten of twelve, so I'll be done with it soon and have another few letters to stick on the end of my name. I don't look for qualifications, I look for courses that interest and will help me.

A lot of people will remember the days of doing grammar at school with a groan or two; what verbs are, what nouns are, pronouns, adjectives, adverbs, whether you've got a dangling participle or, gods forbid, you've split an infinitive or used a double superlative. Heaven help you if you've got an oxymoron.

For most people, English comes naturally, but for others with a learning disorder, it can be a nightmare. (I don't include people for whom English is a second language, I'm talking about people born to the language.)

I was recently contacted by someone I went to high school with. His writing skills are atrocious. It took me some time to decipher what he was saying and while I was pissed at having to do so, it also occured to me that he was probably dyslexic. I have no memory of this fellow, I doubt I was in any of his classes; but he remembered me, or perhaps, he thinks he does: just recognises the name. He was in, what was called then, a 'special learning' class. We all read that to mean the real dumbasses. I doubt I had any thought of whether they had learning difficulties, I was simply smug in my advanced knowledge base.

Once, I would have written back, correcting all the mistakes in his e-mail - how arrogant would that have been? How cruel? Thankfully, that kind of attitude has slipped away; it began to fade when I gave up being a full time journalist, when I was focused on the absolute correctness of my work. I'm more relaxed these days, more willing to allow for style and expression. I still get pissy at bad grammar and spelling, for the latter, there's no real excuse - if in doubt, look in the dictionary. Yeah, I still have an echo of that stick up my butt. And it is a hot button with me.

To be able to communicate effectively in this world, speaking and writing your chosen language is paramount, otherwise, misunderstandings and confusion arise.

As writers, we have a responsibility to express ourselves in clear, concise language. For my school colleague, I can't imagine the difficulties he has with getting his point across unless it's verbal.

The good news is that learning proper English can be a simple as absorbing it. The more books, articles, or whatever read, the better a reader becomes at writing. By listening to the news, to audio books, to speech patterns, people can absorb what sounds right and what doesn't, can learn to differentiate between good language skills and bad, can know what is a colloquialism and what is pure English; and since the English language constantly evolves, can create new ways to say old things. What remains, however, is grammar. Ever and always. Those classes weren't so bad after all.

Now, I have to go and hunt up the onomatopoeia in my assignment and explain the appropriateness of them.