Got Cake?

Aaannddd... just in case you missed it, Hyperbole and a Half blog presents the evilness and ingenuity of a child in: The God of Cake.

Jeez, my parents would have tanned my hide! But then, I was brunged up propa...

Wake up call

Rainbow Lorikeets, it should be noted, love chattering to each other in loud voices, like kids in a school yard.

My neighbour puts out native bird seed for their breakfast and dinner. The air is then filled with the noise of feasting Lorikeets, all trying to shout down the next bird... for a couple of hours.

And at six a.m., I'd like to take a shotgun to them. I'm so not at my best when brought out of a deep sleep by screeching...

However, the early mornings aren't wasted. (I'm the kind of person who, once awakened, is awake - no dozing here.) It's two weeks to Nanowrimo and already I have the first scene of the first book I'll be writing. My subconscious is slipping into Nano-fever and producing stuff at unspeakable hours of the morning. So it doesn't fade away, I've resorted to... gasp, squeak... writing notes.

Yeah, an organic writer making notes. Fortunately, there's no right or wrong way to write and the notes will help. I'm still putting in the edits and don't want to be distracted by what's next.

To that end, I need to get back to the mind games.

Shite and Briney

Six a.m. The rain and too much thinking has conspired to awaken me and keep me awake. I am not soothed by rain on a tin roof, it's loud and obnoxious. La Nina is in full swing, heading to rage.

With Nano coming up in a couple of weeks, I've got a bad case of hmmm-I-must-write-that-down-itis. A syndrome which has no compassion for the time. A lot of writers get it I believe and the only cure is to write the book - or take drugs.

So, I'm at my desk, beavering away (yes, I know I'm on the 'net, but I have the manuscript open and ready to put in the edits). A hundred pages to go and I'm coming up to an emotionally difficult part of the book. It's made me a cranky-pants around the house, because it's a part of the book that must be there. Sigh.

The day is brightening from dark to gloomy and it's chilly, almost back to Winter, except for the dampness. Time for a latte! And words, plenty of words.

Bargain hunting

According to Publisher's Weekly, e-book sales jumped 172% for the month of August and are up nearly 193% for the year. I'd say it's a growing market, wouldn't you?

Maybe the Little Aussie Battler has something to do with it. With the Australian dollar nearly reaching parity with the American dollar, buying books from overseas is suddenly a hunt for the best bargains.

Gotta feel sorry for the tourists in Oz, though. A paperback here costs between $15 and $19 - and I've yet to hear a reasonable argument for it. The old excuse of 'we import them from the US/UK' doesn't work now, and hasn't for some months. Booksellers who boosted their prices during a currency crisis a few years ago, failed to drop their prices when the dollar recovered lost ground and then some.

I don't want to send my money overseas, but t's cheaper for me to buy from someone like Amazon and import it myself, than buy from a local store. And I have more books on the way. Hah!

And gee, Christmas is coming up.

Mockingjay

The Hunger Games Trilogy requires a lot of post-reading thought to decide whether you love it or hate it, or even whether it’s an appropriate young adult series or not. I can’t say that about most books I’ve read and I like thought-provoking books. These books are dark, heart-wrenching and brilliant – but I speak from an adult’s perspective, not a young adult.

In Hunger Games Katniss Everdeen plays and wins – at costs known and unknown to her as she becomes the face of rebellion. In Catching Fire, she plays again, but ‘winning’ comes at a different cost, a greater one, when Peeta, her companion in the first Game, is captured by the evil Capitol. And in Mockingjay Katniss is consumed by the machinations of others and her own guilt (whether deserved or not).

This last book has been criticised for its lack of character development, for its disappointing epilogue, for being depressive, for a whole host of reasons. But for me, it was all appropriate. The horror of brutal oppression and war is bad enough for adults, for professional soldiers, but for a teenager? It’s even more tragic. And in this totalitarian world, the terrorizing and torture of the districts is heinous. It is worse for the teenagers who must accept that they will have to kill or be killed and accept the consequences of their actions for the rest of their lives. For Katniss it goes deeper as she is the face of the rebellion, a pawn in the machinations of others, a tool in the pursuit of power.

And Katniss is near destroyed by it all. She is not permitted to enjoy her revenge on those who used and abused her. Worse, she is punished for it, although if she’d spoken up, maybe things would have ended differently.

Katniss is cunning, petulant, impulsive, selfish, obstreperous, frustrating, indecisive and narrow-minded; but she will sacrifice everything for those she loves, she will protect strangers, beguile the enemy and gather allies to the cause. In short, she’s a teenager. She knows she’s not heroic, but she’s portrayed that way and she cannot escape what others are determined she do. Only once does she feel the power she has over others and even as she understands it, it’s taken away and guilt takes its place.

This is not a perfect book. There are events I found unnecessary to story or character development, one event in particular that served no purpose, even as I understood the reasoning behind it. Without that scene, Katniss had a shot at, if not happiness, then contentment as they rebuilt their lives. The issue of presidents Snow and Coin also raises questions. We know Snow is evil, but again, without a particular scene, it didn’t matter to Katniss whether Coin would make a better president, but Coin takes that extra, unnecessary step and Katniss and her family pay for it.

These books are filled with metaphors and themes from life and they refuse to shy away from the issues of PTSD, of heroes dying needlessly, of villains escaping true justice, of actions and consequences, and what happens to combat soldiers when the war is over.

The trilogy may be a young adult book, but it deals with very adult concepts and there is no escaping the underlying themes. It is no wonder that this is one of the most talked about books of the year.

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

In a dystopian future where the Capitol rules, the twelve impoverished districts are required to send two teenage tributes to the Hunger Games - a fight to the death in an arena of the Gamemaster's making to entertain those living in the Capitol.

Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark have thwarted the Gamesmaster and won the Hunger Games, much to the displeasure of President Snow. Katniss has found herself as the figurehead of brewing rebellion and Snow wants her to quell the subversion. Katniss, however, inadvertently becomes the touchstone of revolution, sparking more violence.

As punishment, two victor tributes from each district must compete again in the arena as part of the Quarter Quell, the 75th anniversary of the Capitol's triumph over the districts.

Katniss and Peeta survived the Games once against those of a similar age; can they survive against those with more experience and maturity?

Suzanne Collins has done a brilliant job with this trilogy. Katniss and Peeta are written well, with all the impulsiveness, emotional confusion, courage and self-doubt of teenagers. Mistakes are made, consequences are dire, but in this brutal future, hope remains.

Like any teenager on the cusp of adulthood, Katniss gets bent out of shape when she's not told of the plans older, supposedly wiser people have for her. She's justifiably furious in parts, petulant and spiteful in others.

The new arena is a wonderful, frightening construct, designed to kill, maim or send the tributes insane. To Katniss and Peeta, the other tributes are crazy and Katniss learns what true sacrifice is. She is the face of the rebellion, the favourite of the Capitol viewing audience, the enemy of President Snow because of one act of defiance.

She is the Mockingjay and she will learn what that truly means.

Tomorrow, when the war began

I took the teens to see Tomorrow, When The War Began. It’s based on the best selling series by Australian author, John Marsden.

The story revolves around a group of teenagers who go camping in North Queensland for a weekend. When they return home, they find everyone incarcerated at the local showground and that the 'Asian Coalition' has invaded Australia.

This isn't a Disney-esque series or film, it's real, sometimes violent and heart-breaking. There is nothing patronising about the situation or the way the characters react, especially when it comes to moral dilemmas. A lot serious, a lot Australian, it has moments of humour. The film suffers from a bit of newbie acting in parts, but overall it is a brilliant local production, one I hope does well in the overseas market.

Each of the characters will appeal to the teenage crowd - adults don't appear much in this. When they do, the tension ratchets up until you're leaning forward in your seat, wondering what the teens are going to do against armed soldiers.

Tomorrow, When The War Began got the big thumbs up from the kids and me. It's an excellent movie.

Teens in the crib

I've got teenagers in the house - I'm borrowing them so the beach doesn't feel so neglected while I'm editing. Actually, I buggered my knee and walking for any distance is a challenge (but the teenagers make a good excuse).

But I'm still editing. It's taking time because I keep getting distracted. You know, by the teens, by the teev, I mean... by the TBR pile and so many other things that conspire against me. (Teen one needed help on 'creative analysis of a metaphysical poem'.) Colour me bug-eyed. We didn't do metaphysics when I went to school. There's also the Cold War essay. But then, my niece is exceptionally clever and loves homework - teen two, not so much.

I think I'll be done by the end of next week. I had a scathingly brilliant idea for the cover - but I think I've forgotten what it was. Maybe I made a note somewhere...

Back to work. I'm taking the aforementioned kiddos to the movies later this afternoon - teen one I think loves homework a little too much and needs time away from it all.

Time shift

Sure, doesn't everyone enjoy getting up an hour earlier?

It's that time of the year when the winter season ends and summer-time begins: Daylight Savings (which is really weird, because we get the same amount of sunshine, so where's the saving?)

I remember as a kid DST lasted for three months. Then some bright spark shifted it four and following our Olympics it's now six months.

I'm still getting used to getting up, bleary eyed, and noting the time is an hour later than I'd like - then there's the staring at the ceiling when I go to bed because I'm there and hour earlier.

Sigh. This, too, shall pass...

Death of a Great

Bernard Schwartz has died of a cardiac arrest at the age of 85.

I remember him with fondness - he was an actor I crushed on, many, many people crushed on him.

Who is Bernard? Trivial Pursuit players know, but his stage name is Tony Curtis.

I loved his movies. Suppose They Gave A War and Nobody Came?, The Persuaders with Roger Moore, Some Like It Hot weirded me out a little, Taras Bulba, The Great Race, The Defiant Ones... so many great films.

The black hair and mischievous eyes, buff bod (when he was younger).

His daughter, Jamie Lee Curtis, says it perfectly:

"My father leaves behind a legacy of great performances in movies and in his paintings and assemblages. He leaves behind children and their families who loved him and respected him and a wife and in-laws who were devoted to him. He also leaves behind fans all over the world. He will be greatly missed."

I know I'll watch re-runs of his movies on the teev.

Kudos and Krims

Okay, colour me impressed.

With the Aussie Dollar nearing parity with the American Dollar, I thought I'd order some books from Amazon - coz, you know, books are way cheaper over there than here. (I refuse to pay $AUS46 here for an imported hardback.)

I decided to order Warriors edited by George R. R. Martin and has stories in by David Weber (squee!), Carrie Vaughn, Diana Gabaldon, Naomi Novik, David Morell, S.M. Stirling, Robin Hobb, the list goes on... and Tanya Huff's The Truth of Valor.

Amazon e-mailed me to say I could expected the books...mmm, sometime in November (sea mail). They would be my reward for finishing Nano.

Except... Warriors turned up today - two weeks after I ordered it. WOOT!! And I live in the country, so it would have taken a couple of days to get here from the nearest major city, Sydney.

The book and postage and handling cost me less than $AUS30.

* * *

Not so impressive, is the phone call I received today regarding viruses on my computer. The heavily-accented Indian woman told me to turn on my computer so they could search for the aforementioned malicious virus. What? I figured the next demand would be for me to turn off the firewall.

When I asked how she knew my computer had a virus, she said an international research group had been compiling information from my area, but would not tell me how she got my phone number, referring to the international group again.

On what planet does anyone think letting an unknown group into a personal computer is a good thing? And why would they think I'd blithely give them access? Security for my computer is my responsibility. I have a firewall, I have anti-virus software. If I want it sorted, I'll contact a local computer expert, not some amorphous overseas group.

I wonder if this is a new scam to invade personal computers for the purpose of identity theft, account details and passwords. It's certainly more brazen than the Nigerians.

I declined her invitation - next time, should they call again, I won't be so polite.

And I'm getting more than a little pissed off at people cold-calling me. I'm on a 'do not call' register, damn it!

Planning stage

Winter is having one last hurrah before the weekend. Then it has to stop and wait for next year.

Daylight Savings Time begins on Saturday, or early Sunday morning, whichever you prefer. A lost hour somewhere in the night, temporarily taken and returned in six months. I think there might be a story in that...

And since it's been chilly today, it was nice to be warm inside, working away at the edits. Only another fifteen thousand words to find and Huntress: Unbreakable will be done; then I can prepare for Nano season.

I'm thinking another Huntress or two to wrap it up. I'm not eager to see it go on and on. I haven't thought of an ending yet, but it will come to me. Eventually. I hope. At the moment, I can see a sort of solution, but can't quiet see how it will work.

I have time yet to jot down a few notes.

Patience

It's been slow going today on the edits.

I know writers are supposed to be able to work through anything, but waiting for the plumber simply broke my concentration. Every time I focused, I thought I heard them pull up. What is it about expecting people that interferes? I had one eye on the work and the other on the door; one ear listening to the dialogue, the other on the traffic outside.

Of course, if I slipped up the street, that would have been when they arrived; even going to the bathroom was fraught with... um, the expectation of a knock on the door? Yeah, TMI. Forget I said that.

It never does any good to ask what time they'll arrive, either - I don't think tradesmen work that way, although some do. "Will you be home all day." Seems the stock question. And since the tap's been leaking for a while, the only answer I could give was 'yes'.

And now they've done the job and gone - the wallet much lighter - I can concentrate again.

Waiting for tradesmen is one of life's little trials.

So, while I'm doing the edits, story lines for Nano keep popping up. I expect it to get worse as November draws near. Which means I need to get back to it and indulge in a little overtime.

Bee sluts

Ah, Spring; when a young writer's fancy turns to anything, but sitting down and doing the damn work!

The sun is shining, the weather is mild and flowers are busting out to attract the first bee that looks sideways at them.

Bee-sluts, every one of 'em. And you can see why:

The bush rose, growing tall and gathering in bunches so the bees can look up their stems, and then check out the innocent, butter-yellow petals.

The white camellia, all pretty and virginal, luring in the bad-boy bee with the promise of seductive perfection.

The pink camellia, new, fresh and oh, so feminine in its coy, just opening to the world. Probably as bad as the white camellia.

All in the garden, all wanting carnal relations with the bees. See? Bee-sluts, desperate for a bee to walk all over them, to be covered in... pollen, then go back and brag to their fellow bees.

Yeah, I can imagine it: graffiti scrawled on the side of the hive, 'for a good time, check out the white camellia', or 'free nectar over at the bush rose!' 'the McCartney Rose wants you!'. And down at the bottom, where the 'in' crowd avoid, another sign: 'Coming soon: veggie patch delights'.

And before you know it, the cycle begins. Again.

Yep, Mother Nature is hosting a season-long party, and not a regency prude amongst them.

Jennifer Rardin

I was shocked to read this week that urban fantasy author Jennifer Rardin died. A few days before, she'd posted pictures, looked and sounded as happy as a lark; then, the post announcing her passing.

The Jaz Parks series might not be on my absolutely must re-read shelf, but they are entertaining and I thought she'd have a long career as a writer. Each book was better than the previous one...

Maybe I'll re-read them after all, as a tribute to an author who was taken from us too soon.

Where I'm at

I've printed out Huntress: Unbreakable, with the plan to read through and do more edits some time in the next week. This week I'm so busy, even my unbusy bits are busy.

At 74k, it needs more. Not plot, I think it has enough, but descriptions - which I'm not so good at - and dialogue. I'm looking at adding another 6k, which may or may not be possible. Damn, but I need some beta readers.

Then it's trying to work up an appropriate cover. Nup, nothing springs to mind. I'm sure something will occur and there's the wonderful world of free photos out there.

Maybe I should get one of my talented sisters to design something for me?

Anyway. Huntress: Unbreakable should be posted within the next month. And then... and then... it's Nano and the writing of another Huntress book!

Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

In an oppressive, dystopian American future, the twelve Districts must send two ‘Tributes’, selected by lottery, for the Hunger Games – a brutal competition where the winner is the last one alive. Tributes are between the ages of twelve and eighteen and sixteen-year-old Katniss Everdeen volunteers to take her younger sister’s place.

Life for the Everdeens in District 12 is a constant battle against starvation, and Katniss provides food and money through illegal hunting in the woods. She is certain she will die in the Hunger Games – some tributes have trained their entire lives for the Games, are stronger, bigger, smarter than Kat and the District’s second Tribute, baker’s son, Peeta.

Katniss is aware the Games are for the televised entertainment of the decadent Capitol, and the mental torture of the other districts. As the Game continues, she begins to understand that she may have a chance after all.

While this is a Young Adult novel, Hunger Games will capture the imagination of older readers. Suzanne Collins has created a nightmarish future of hard-scrabble survival for the Districts as a reminder of who rules the country of Penam following a rebellion seventy years past. It’s a brutal life for all except the citizens of the Capitol.

Katniss displays all the emotional insecurity of a teenager and has a belligerent determination to do the best she can, even pretending Peeta is the love of her life to ensure the support of ‘sponsors’ who send gifts into the Games. The consequences of which will, I’m sure, be explored in later books.

The characters are well-crafted, the world-building is excellent and the political system disturbingly real.

It’s a rare book that will keep me up to wee hours. It’s even rarer for me to keep thinking about a novel. This is a masterpiece that wrenches an emotional response from the reader. The ethical and moral dilemmas Kat faces are heart-stopping.

Suzanne Collins is an author to watch. This is a book I recommend to anyone.

Diva-dom

A new book is out on the 'net about a certain author.

Here's the blurb:

Ever wonder what it is like to work for a Best Selling Author? Ever wonder what it would be like to be their assistant? Melody and Miriam had been friends for years after first meeting at a science fiction convention by accident. Miriam was a author and in need of help. Melody was in need of a job. When Miriam offered Melody a job she took it. What could be better for a bibliophile than working for an author and a friend? It was the start of a ten year odyssey as Melody helped Miriam move from paperback original author to hardback and #1 Best Seller. They navigated the tricky waters of the publishing business together, learning about all aspects of the brutal world of publishing. Unfortunately, along the way, Miriam fell victim to the many traps of fame and fortune because the diva ate her.

And here's the link to: The Diva Ate Her

I'll leave it up to you to decide whom the famous author is...

Ahoy! Me Hearties!

Ahoy, ye scurvy dogs!

It's Talk Like a Pirate Day, which means poor English grammar and syntax, arrrr...

So, a quick lesson:

Ahoy! - "Yo!"
Avast! - "Check it out!"
Aye! - "Yes."
Arrr! - "That's right!" (often confused with arrrgh...)
Arrrgh! - "I'm VERY miffed."

Pirates drink tankards of ayel (ale) or rum, eat without using cutlery, don't brush their teeth (they rinse with the aforementioned ale or rum, and use dirks or boucans as dental floss) and personal hygiene is a personal choice rarely taken - unless tossed overboard, and few pirates could actually swim.

As a bit o' history, the pirate speech may have been heavily influenced by Cornish and the West Country dialects. Like a lot of dialects, distance and time changed the language

ITLAPD was created in 1996 by Cap'n Slappy and Ol' Chumbucket, alias, John Baur and Mark Summers.

Go and check out the ten top pick up lines on ITLAPD for inspiration.

Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Hyperbole

All I can say about today's Hyperbole and a Half, entitled 'The Party' is... bwahahaha!!!

Damn, that cracks me up!

O_o Work? What work? I'm having a weekend in Canberra...